A Singaporean In Australia

Japanese massage girl was so-so. The white fags were right after all. Those ATBs who didn't speak a word of engrish were talents! At least they seemed to be able to knead my pain away when I was in Singapore. Curiously I revisited Mindy's thread again and read the positive reviews about her massaging skills. Hmm, I didn't hold it against her. She was trained more for relaxation massage, not remedial massage. Also, I found some 'reputable' businesses here offering massage for $100 per hour. So ... that makes the home business folks cheap when they asked for $70-80 per hour. No wonder Mindy's customers were delighted to have her around Perth and claimed she was a bargain!

Nabei, can each of you in Singapore just donate a few hundred dollars to me so that I can start a massage parlour a healing sanctuary or something? It looks like I could pay the bills with just 5 customers a day. Then I could go around hooded like Green Arrow breaking my friends' arms in the dark with high dexterity and then my business card magically appears in their letterbox in their times of grief. Profit! Hmm. This suggestion will only leave me with less friends rather than more money. Maybe Duchess' daddy's suggestion of setting up a online pay-pal donation box should be considered. He reckoned people should be paying me for my 'advice', any token sum will do. However I am very hesitant in doing so because I don't want to lose the liberty to speak my mind. Just imagine what our PAP ministers will say to the PM in Parliament if they are paid an ordinary Singaporean's salary, a few thousand bucks per month. Party whip or not, the PM should be thankful if a plate of Humless Mee Siam doesn't fly his way. With a million dollar salary though, woah - that's a difficult story. The ministers will lick the table legs clean if they have to, much less dispute policies. So if I am replying the email with donations in my mind, what will I end up saying?

Having said that, it can be fun trying it out for a week and see what happens. Not that I am expecting $70k to flow into my bank account in a week, it would be a brand new inspiration if I get a surprising amount say, $20 a week to pump up the fuel tank. That wave of inspiration could be translated to a new blog called The Singaporean Online Beggar. If anyone claimed to be inspired by a mundane story of a migrating Singaporean with bad English, surely Singaporean Online Beggar (SOB) will melt hearts? I can even imagine the blog tagline already. "No camo, no props, no fake sunglasses or bad singing." Hmm. I apologise. I shouldn't let the bag out of the cat. Someone once told the public, "There are no beggars in Singapore." In Singapore, beggars without licences are illegal vendors. Beggars with licences are street buskers. Thus, there are no beggars in Singapore. Lest I incur the wrath of the authorities for suggesting Singaporean beggars actually exists, my new blog should be called Singaporean Online Busker (still SOB)

Seriously, any investors willing to set up a massage center with me? I can't stand the girly names of the centres here. Such as Lotus and Lime Massage or Bodyriches Massage. We need some manly steel in this industry. Let's call it the Hand Smith or Paladin's Touch. Or maybe a more Aussie business name, Jim's Massage or Sausage 'N' Massage. Yes, overtime is getting to me. I need rest.