A Singaporean In Australia

******

A serious NDP Rally

What Singapore and its people could really benefit if PM Lee could take his selected team  to present their masterplan addressing the concerns of the people and the issues of our country, on this day every year. They will then face off in a 'live' debate on national television with the shadow cabinet formed by the opposition parties. Whose else are better qualified than the opposition team to debate the merits and fallacies of policies with the government? Not bloggers for sure, no matter how insightful some of us can be at times. Let this be between the professionals and rightly so. PM Lee and his team will prove the merits of their grand policies in the debate and even have the chance to put the opposition shadow cabinet to shame, to batter them into oblivion if they are worth their salt. It should be kept clean and fair. No subtle threat of suing a member of the opponent, no commercial break when someone in the wrong team hits a home run and the audience must be invited randomly from the Singapore public.

If PM Lee is adamant about snuffing out noises from the cyberspace, he should seriously consider the above. If The PM would lead his team to debate and emerge victorious with sound policies that the oppositions couldn't fault or better on national TV, broad casted 'live', I dare say even the harshest cyber critic will tip his hat at the PAP team. Many birds, one stone. Nothing to worry about, PM Sir.

以德服人，心服口服

Dear Mr Tang,

I hope this email finds you well! We’re launching a new Straits Times Political website just before the National Day Rally. As part of the launch we’ll have a bunch of stuff up – including one bit titled “What I want to hear from PM on Sunday..” i.e what issues/topics/ announcements you personally want to hear at the National Day Rally. We’re getting MPs, bloggers, observers etc. Do you mind contributing? Very brief – one or two paragraphs will suffice. We will copy and paste the whole thing in, so it’s not an interview style and it won’t be edited.

Would it be possible for you to contribute? If possible by late tonight or tomorrow morning? So sorry for the tight window but we just need like 200 words, max!

Many thanks!

R C
Political Desk,
The Straits Times

*****

I don't wish to be a busybody, it isn't me. Since this email was forwarded to me, I guess I was invited to comment on it. Else, I couldn't think of what was the motive of letting me know. It was an email from The Straits Times to our most famous Train Officer Blogger in Singapore. To me, he is the most famous blogger in Singapore now. I see his name mentioned everywhere in Straits Times, mentioned in a serious tone mind you and that is something. I mean, you see the blog of a plastic bimbo with pink hair  appearing on mainsteam media now and then, but who really take that seriously?

Remember the Association of Singapore bloggers? [link] I wasn't blogging back then in 2009 but I remembered having some thoughts about it. My first instinct was that the government was trying to control the internet by conquering the divided bloggers. Just look at their last post in their blog. It was typically how we run government agencies. Who are they fooling? It was a tame attempt as that association lasted for 2 months and closed shop. Even I could run my blog for more than 2 months writing stories nobody reads or share. They couldn't even pretend to have the heartware to do better. It was a joke.


Since then Singapore bloggers remained disunited. Perhaps it is meant to be, as blogosphere thrives on creation, individualism and independency. But the most attractive features of blogosphere turns out to be its weakest link. It is easy to conquer the divided and the government knows that. It is pointless for us to talk in codes like Farmer has been doing because the cat was already out of the bag for some time now. It is the same strategy of how government agencies in the world dealt with hackers. In the earlier days of mass internet, hackers were a force to be reckoned with. Agencies tried stopping their rampages by setting guidelines, laws and strengthening web security. None of these worked as well as getting hackers themselves to be their frontline. They termed them White Hats.

White. I shivered at the thought of it. The war has already begun, based on the new strategy.

We already have the crappiest shit I've ever seen here [link] who displays fabrications of fabrications about the PAP. There has been individual bloggers converted into Whities, I was told by a friend who is a fervent blog scout over the years. She even remembered the blog names of the converts. Well they are still doing it aren't they, looking at how things are going?

The above email raised so many questions in my head when I was reading through it. I almost could not believe my eyes and had to re-read it twice, thrice before it finally dawned on me. They never changed, sneaky bastards. Looks like our friend here is being recruited to be the this year's Poster Boy of the National Day Rally. I was forced to run my WhiteAxeTrainer V5.4 decoding software on that email and this was how the message was translated:

If this goes on, parents will soon storm into that army camp, telling that army barber how to cut his son's hair. If any of my ex-teachers were to read this, written by that rebellious student, they will be so surprised. Yes, but yes, this is coming from me.

Long time ago, I was a schoolboy like any Singaporean son out there. I was definitely far from the model student though I wasn't quite the aspiring school drop-out either. The Haircut Game wasn't a new game. Back then, with the exception from goody good boys, from the hardcore pai kia to the average rebellious teenage boy, we eagerly participated in the Haircut Game. It was almost like the typical Chinese New Year black jack games in the grand parents' place in the olden days, the discipline master was the banker, the naughty boys were the gamblers.

As imaginative teens, we would like to believe we were specialists in the game. Like a computer game, the noob had saliva, the richer ones had hair gel or spray. These days, I expect the young punks to have state of the art technology to play the game. They shouldn't disappoint. We tested different hypotheses. We tried complex theories of physics to remain in the blind spots of the Game Master marching from the assembly area to our classrooms. We dabbled with mind reading. We had a few go at forecasting weather. We put probability concepts to test. We mastered the art of dodging by improving our dexterity.

It was great fun. But everyone knew the rules - very well. Everyone knew when it was going to be a warning, when we were going to have a real really bad time. Basically like any other games or sports, you could always push it and be a hero but if you screwed up, be prepared to face the music, or even humiliated. It was the name of the game. If you want to play the game, don't play the blame. It should be confined in the school. Parents should never be involved. More so the police. What the hell is happening to our kids and parents?

I strongly disagree with that parent in the article who suggested, "We are not living in the past anymore," or something crappy along the line. Getting a free haircut but untrained hair stylist was nothing new. It was classic and should always remain so. Removing that away from the game is akin taking away the "Go to Jail" square in Monopoly and replacing it with "Smell the flowers, take $200".  Or removing the "Snakes" in Snakes & Ladders and put "Maids" in their place to help soldiers players move twice as fast. New age parents are real wimps. I wondered which generation did they grow up in.  Maybe almost the same generation as me.

Oops.

So what happened to "we were once young"? Are the current batch of parents cloned from the DNA of sheep right into their adulthood from start? Any wonder the current youth were branded mollycoddled by Ah Gong? For Raistlin's sake, stop proving him right. What was the parent thinking when she suggested, 

If parents sincerely want their children to be educated, they have to rethink hard about working with, or against the teachers.  When I say education, I don't mean learn to write and add, ace exams and moving on. A rebellious student should know the rules and weigh between the benefits and consequences should they choose to be a recalcitrant. Moral values are always part of education. What message are we sending to our kids if we are prepared to do ridiculous acts for them, such as making a police report for an unauthorised hair cut? What will the teen be thinking of when he beats the red light driving his first car in the future?

If it is our wish to cultivate a powerful new generation who could vanquish any foreigner excuse the government could muster, parents have to work with the teachers again as our previous generations of parents did. Stand on the teachers' side, re-empower them the old school style. Tell the teachers loudly, "Teacher, if my son misbehave, punish him!" In front of his classmates for better effect. His friends' parents should do the same. All of them. The holy trinity of parents-principal-teacher should never be broken. They should work as a team for the sake of a better generation. There are wisdom passed down from hundred years of civilisation, regardless of culture. Who are the parents to dismiss wisdom in the name of modernity?

不打不成才

Spare the rod and spoil the child

Parents, you know the rules. You know the name of the game. If you want to play the game, don't play the blame.

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Update for The Barry White Project

This is probably the last one or two updates on it. Surprisingly someone turned up for my roof racks. It was a couple from USA. The girl was petite and young, her boyfriend or husband looked older than me. They were the first buyers who didn't know much about cars.

Jen came out to have a chat with them. They seemed to like Albany and Albany, strangely seemed to endear very well to the girl and responded cheerily during our conversations. I didn't catch much of their stories but I knew they were travelers. The first question I wanted to ask was of course, how could they afford to travel for life. They revealed that they find work in the hospitality field. That made sense. I reckoned it was easy to find hospitality jobs in most places we might travel to. Both of them saved up fervently and move on to the next destination. They were not planning to come back to Perth anymore.

Coincidentally, they drove a model identical to Barry White and was white too. With their Seca, they are planning to drive to the eastern cities. Which one, I didn't quite catch but one thing for certain, my rack will be holding up a lot of stuff for them for many many kilometres. A nomadic style of living is not a new idea here. I had a conversation with a lady in Pemberton whose husband makes motor-homes for a living. She shared interesting tales about travellers who actually work and travel around Australia, one family doing it as long as ten years!  

I will miss my rack. After all, they helped me set up my first home in Perth. A lot of my furniture was brought home on top of that set of roof rack. I'm glad they are off to a better home, on top of someone else's car, doing what it should be doing. With that, it was A$60.00 more to the Barry White Project.

It was funny to read old letters from a friend. I could still remember replying her fury of messages during 2300hrs breaks in my last job. She told me it was around March then.

A Singaporean Mom Seeking Advice

More questions from Singaporean Mom

Time passed quickly didn't it? Back then Singaporean Mom had not gotten her Australian PR visa. Along the way she cleared her medical (the subject she bugged me most) and then her PR visa was approved (not my credit) and she finally came over to have dinner one evening during her one week recce.

M has a brave soul in her. Of course, having financial backing helps. Still, venturing alone to a strange land with a son and nobody else is daunting. I will not even think about it coming here on my own, let alone with a child. Ok, I know many PRC 陪读妈妈 did the same coming to Singapore, but PRCs and PRCs. They'll venture to amazon forests if they see the need to. Not many Singaporeans would feel comfortable leaving our homeland in comparison. Well because Singapore is great and we have the best government in the world. Also, Remember R.A.T.S?

M has a plan and appears to be the meticulous type. She has every small detail sorted out and is very clear what she wants to do. It is safe to say she is the female Edmund, well organised and foresighted. Within a week she managed to enroll her child in a school in Perth. So it is safe to say we will see her again next year. She also commented she chose to live in the North of River to siam me far far. Nonetheless, M became the first visitor who stubbornly did the dishes after dinner during her first visit to our place despite me telling her not to.

Ryan, the gentleman from Singapore who contacted us also came over our place with Joanna for dinner. We hope our meals were alright, good enough to host. He wanted to have a meal out and give us all a treat. I couldn't let him, not when he was guest. He insisted we should be doing that the next time though, so we can relax and do away with the cooking and washing. Maybe. Tell us when you are coming again, Ryan. We'll be happy to do that. I didn't get much chance to talk to both Ryan and M because I had to make food. M even had to babysit Albany and read stuff to her. Albany seemed to like M though, or it could be her Ipad.

It felt a tad odd to meet up with folks you have known for quite some time but have never met. When we met it seemed we weren't strangers, yet in a way we were.

Last week was Ah Hua week. Many of us fondly refer Stephen as that because, well, we are fond of him. I met him on Thursday. He came for dinner along with M, the Singaporean mum who finally came for a week to look at Perth and Ryan, the kind heart who sent us an ang bao for Albany without knowing us. We met them both for the first time, knowing them for more than half a year respectively. 

On Friday, Ah Hua lent me a helping hand transporting a bed from Shamirah to Thusara so that he could sleep on something rather than the hard, cold floor of his new temporary home at Yan Chun. That was kind of him, because I made the promise to help and couldn't fulfill it due to cock-ups in my planning. Ah Hua saved the day by agreeing to help to save my ass. I'm thankful for the help.

If that wasn't enough, Ah Hua opened his 'shop' on Saturday and invited us over along with the folks who lived nearby. The noodles he whipped up was delicious. The soup looked deceptively ordinary, like those in our hawker centres many of us would not finish drinking. It tasted exceptional, brewed intricately from bones, without enhancers or flavourings. The taste of the dish was more authentic than many of the current Singapore noodle stalls in the food courts. It was the taste of the owner-hawkers, the nation builders of the yester-years which is fast becoming a rarity in the richest country in the world. Our rich food heritage will vanish in a generation or two because we did not expect it to, and did not make plans to preserve it.

Ah Hua gave me lots of face and came along with our family on Sunday, all the way up to Lesmurdie Falls. The problem was that it was Sunday. Sundays are for cooping at home. It was his birthday and I thought it would be nice to breathe some fresh air instead of cooping up at home on birthdays. He came along anyway and we were glad. Both Steph and Joni like Albany. You'll like people who treat your children well, it is natural. We planned to do a quick visit to the Falls and return home to have a rest but we ended up spending a long day instead. The chat was good, on the peak of Lesmurdie Falls. Fantastic air, fantastic view, no mosquitoes, free parking, sparse, no crowds.

There are lots to learn from Ah Hua, to begin with he shares some interesting life philosophies now and then that I can actually think about. Before that, I  think I will benefit from the lessons of his wicked cooking.

It still happen often. When I make deliveries and get bored with the seemingly endless roads, I think of the little bundle at home. Time passes so quickly everyday such that I am rushing for time rather than wishing the hours away. Before long, I'll knock off from work and that's when I really yearn to be at home at the soonest possible. So I can hold Albany, smell her and make each other laugh. 

She can flip herself back and forth now and I was fortunately enough to be there, looking over her as a proud father. I witnessed her struggling, whimpering in her difficulties but I held myself back to give a helping hand. Somethings, we have to do it ourselves. I was there in a flash when she made it, celebrating with Albany and calling out to Jen, who was whipping up our meals. We were very happy, all three of us.

When they don't do it, they don't. When they do, they do it too often. By now, it is difficult to contain her. She flips so quickly, sometimes consecutively and landed outside the soft yoga mat before you know it. I don't feel too comfortable with that because sometimes she looks like she bumps her head on the floor. I may have to extend the mat boundary.

Jen showed me Albany's earlier pictures as a infant. How quickly has she grown. You tend not to notice it seeing her everyday. I could still remember every moment of her birth and how we spent the time alone by the window bench in our hospital ward, watching the evening sun. She was sleeping soundly in my arms. She refuses to sleep in my arms anymore because she wants to share every precious moment with her Dad playing. Every evening we spent some moments 'dancing' by the window. Whenever I hum a waltzing tune, do a mock dance while holding her close to me, she will glance at our reflections of the window and chuckle and chuckle and chuckle.

******

By 2012, Singapore is the country with the lowest fertility in the world. It is a serious issue and we think we may have found a solution to it. If only it is as simple as that: Look at the Singaporean Malays, learn their bedroom secrets, convince rest to adopt their ways and Singapore's fertility woes will be resolved. In truth, the causes behind low fertility involved factors which are more complex, often intertwined and paradoxical.

A comparison was done by Swee-Hock Saw in 1990 comparing fertility rates in Malaysia and Singapore, two countries with very similar language and cultural demographics. In the study, it is worth noting that by 1987, Chinese fertility rate in peninsular Malaysia (Malays 4.51, Chinese 2.25, Indians 2.77) was greater than the Malay's fertility in Singapore (Malays 2.16, Chinese 1.48, Indians 1.95). Singapore only ceased to be part of Malaysia since 1965. What changes did Singapore go through in two decades that causes such a significant differences between the fertility demographics of both countries?

Antinatalism by the PAP

Was it Lee Kuan Yew's fault?

Not really. Let's recap by comparing Singapore's fertility rates between 1987 and today:

1987 (Malays 2.16, Chinese 1.48, Indians 1.95)

2012 (Malays 1.64, Chinese 1.08, Indians 1.09)

Note Malaysia's big fertility changes over the same period

1987 (Malays 4.51, Chinese 2.25, Indians 2.77)

2012 (Malays 2.60, Chinese 1.50, Indians 1.70) [source]

The big question - Should we be looking at the Malays?

No. Consider this:

Drop (Malays -31.7%, Chinese -37.0%, Indians -78.9%)

It's the population density, stupid

Special thanks to Joni, who took many pictures for us and Stephen who cooked dinner for us. It was a hazy day, else it would be more of a sight. It didn't have to be perfect because it was good enough for me. I was happy, very happy.

Lesmurdie Falls was only a 20 minutes drive from my place. There wasn't much I could do to describe the place. It would not be the last time Jen, Albany and I visit this place for sure. I hope you enjoy this as much as I did.

Lesmurdie Falls, Winter 2012

Yes, that's a truck stuck in the hills. Don't ask me why and how.

Naughty bandicoot

Nesting birds

Camo bird

Don't ask me how and why

Beautiful flowers at the base of the waterfall, everywhere

Jen kept singing "There was a stream", she was happy.

That's the truck in the hills again, if you look carefully

Albany, me and Perth