A Singaporean In Australia

In a flash, thirteen years had gone by since I first met Jenny. I kept this series as my time capsule to remind myself time waits for no man. It seemed only yesterday we moved to Perth, five months into the pregnancy of Albany. Ten days ago, little Albany turned two. Five days ago was our 3rd wedding anniversary. Or was it 4th? It should be the 4th. It was a sign that the book of memories was getting thicker. 

For the past two, three weeks, Jen and I had probably watched more movies than the entire thirteen years we knew each other. Jen had always enjoy movies but we rarely do that because I hate the movie experience in Singapore. Often, I need to travel through the traffic of Singapore, squeeze with the crowd, watch the beautiful silhouette of the giant in front, experience a free manual chair massage from the asshole at the back, endure with additional narration from movie go-ers and creative sound effects of popcorn crunching. And crying babies - I don't hate that but crying babies and movie simply don't mix. Over time, my friends thought I didn't appreciate movies and my invitations dwindled. Eventually I started to believe that myself only to discover it wasn't true after we watched the first movie at the comfort of our living room by ourselves after Albany went to bed.

Albany wasn't the baby like she used to and had became more independent, such as visiting her potty in the toilet herself and started picking up words to communicate with us. The day before she climbed down the stairs, wore her own shoes and wailed by the door in the dark. She didn't know how to express that but it was clear she wanted a 'gai gai'. I had been meeting her increasing needs of a growing toddler by taking her to the park after work to let her run, climb and put her on her favourite swing. She just learnt how to use a slide. I was convinced these moments were reasons to live. On some nights before I slept, thoughts of sacrificing these moments with my child due to work sent shivers down my spine. The prospects of losing all and these and being forced to return to Singapore one day was more fearful than the daunting experience of leaving the safe island into the unknown. We moved to Perth with an adventurous attitude with a mild mix of rebellious and willfulness. I hoped to find peace but didn't expect happiness.

To a large extent, happiness is about how much control we have in our lives. The higher the level of control, the more accessible we are to happiness. The move here was a prime example of that but it was only the beginning of the story. Much needs to be done to increase the level of control. Twenty seven months had passed since we moved to Perth. I had achieved little after the first twelve months. Cancer was a distraction but it shouldn't be an excuse. 2014 is the year. The project has to start this year.