A Singaporean In Australia

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It just occurred to me this blog wouldn't have existed till now if Australia's immigration policies are as lackadaisical as Singapore's. After putting up so many FAQs (filed under the Migration label), there is still a constant stream of emails from Singaporeans asking for help in regards to immigration to Australia. As it seems, it is still difficult to get a permanent residence visa in Australia. Either that or Singaporeans do not bother to read. I am giving Singaporeans the benefit of doubt here. After subjecting myself to scanning through the Australian Immigration website time and again for dyslexic Singaporeans these few years, I did the same for something I would probably never need to do if not out of curiosity. I tried to put myself into the shoes of others trying to immigrate to Singapore instead.


Within a couple of minutes, I was shaking my head. No wonder we have been facing a glut of dodgy migrants that we (that includes the PAP government) have no idea how they got in until it is too late. I am giving the government the benefit of doubt (seriously) here, else whoever approved those immigration policies ought to be publicly executed. Even for Australia's stringent immigration policies, migrants wannabes from some countries (shan't name which) still managed to sneak in cleverly through loopholes and back doors. Trust me on this, Singapore have no chance against these lot. No fucking chance.


The weakest link is that ICA allows anyone who has been living and working in Singapore for at least 6 months under the age of 50 to apply for a Singapore PR. That alone is only 1/4 the time required for someone working under an employment pass in Australia to apply for an Australia PR visa. The criteria for Singapore's PR approval isn't difficult at all. Check out our requirements.


Your education background. Singapore authorities give a lot of weight to your degree and the institute where you graduated.

Fake degrees anyone? [link]
We have no stringent skills or certification assessment bodies in Singapore like the Australian counterparts such as VETASSESS, TRA, CPA, ANMAC etc. Thus a certification such as MBA (Southern Pacific University) ended up being "given a lot of weight" to someone.


Your physical stay in Singapore. The longer your physical stay in Singapore, the more the authorities will be convinced that you plan to reside in Singapore permanently.

I didn't know ICA give points for campers.


Your employment background and the stability of your job

Shouldn't be difficult to get a convincing referral. IDA may be a good start.


Credentials of your employer (the more established the company, the better)

Who can refute the credentials of a GLC, statutory board or ministry? See above. Else, there is no harm snooping around some MNCs located at expo, since you can speak the same dialect as the HR managers working in those companies. Bring some beer along.


Your salary and financial well-being

Welcome to Singapore. Your orientation 1.01 - Money talks. Fortunately Australia does not have this unique requirement for their PR visa, else a pissed poor peasant like me will never be able to get in. Still, fret not. Get the villagers back home to pool a shitload of cash to place in your bank account. Shitty interest rates I know but bear with it for a while. After the ICA approving officer is impressed with the zeroes in your bank account and approves your PR, you may transfer the lump sum to the next fellow villager coming via the same route as you.


Your character (such as whether or not you are a law-abiding citizen)

Easy, easy. According to the Prime Minister of Singapore, Singaporeans commit more crimes than foreigners. [link] So it must be easy to look law-abiding. Singaporeans make it easy for you.


Your family ties in Singapore. If you have family ties, it’s considered a positive factor.

Of course you have family ties. Of course, of course. ICA loves families, cousins, relatives, uncle's dog's bitch's owner's sister. Positive factor.


Your charitable contributions to society such as volunteering, donations, etc.


Take a cue from our brother here. Caretaker, PAP grassroot member, plenty of donations all sponsored by your everyday way-to-honest Singaporean.


So in order to stay in Singapore for 6 months, how do I get an employment pass in the first place?

The Singapore employment pass requirements:

Minimum salary requirement of $3,300. 

That's where the carton of beer comes useful. When your fellow villager cum HR manager in MNC is a little bit tipsy, you'll get it done. Else, use the classic method that has been around for decades, offer to pay your employer $1,800 in cash after each pay day. So you are effectively an employment pass holder working on $1,500. MOM approved method. Not only this allows you to walk in to your job, beating your Singaporean competitors, you have no NS liability so as to allow your employer to milk the last drop out of you - unlike Singaporean losers who will be deployed to do crowd control when MRT trains break down.


Aside from the minimum salary, the applicant’s educational qualifications and work experience are also key considerations for the MOM in granting the EP.

Your credentials are faker than Xia Xue's face. So don't worry about key considerations, since they are going to be impressive like fuck. Since our DPM Teo Chee Hean do not think there is a need for a checking system [link] for your qualifications, who gives a heck about your working experience? Also, the hiring manager is not going to even call your referees, because it's him.


A tertiary degree from a reputable university and relevant professional experience is important. Applicants should be educationally qualified with qualifications from reputable institutions. In some cases, your strong professional employment history and good salary may compensate for lack of good education. Your proposed employment in Singapore must be relevant to your prior experience and education.

Hahahahahahahahahaha~~~~


There is no official quota system. Each application is reviewed by authorities based on the credentials of the employing company and the applicant.

Explained: legs open wide. Uniquely Singapore. More good years ahead! Always here for you! Confidence for the future!
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"Having an appreciating asset is certainly better than not owning anything. Fifty years of continuous progress and compulsory saving through the Central Provident Fund and home ownership have put Singaporean families in an enviable position as compared to their counterparts in almost every other country. This is a legacy which we should appreciate and treasure.”


Listen up Singaporeans. If you think you own your HDB flat, you don't. You really don't. The government has already admitted that the value of your HDB flats will be zero at the end of your 99 year lease. If you still would like to think that you are owning something, all that you own is a depreciating asset like owning a car in Singapore.


Would you believe it is possible to make money buying and selling a vehicle in Singapore? I did. When I bought 2005 Renault Kangoo 4 years old in 2009, it had 6 years COE left then. I paid $14,500 for it. I used it for work for the next 2 years. In mid 2011, I sold the van for $15,000 because in my preparation to move overseas. Though insignificant, I still made a profit on this deal, which is generally inconceivable because as a rule of thumb, everyone knows you lose money the moment you buy a depreciating asset like a car. How did I make a profit on that? Raising COE. During my 2 year ownership of the vehicle, COE prices spiked. Thus by the time I was selling it, I was able to recoup much of my vehicle depreciation and even make a small profit on it. Does this mean a car is an appreciating asset? Definitely not. Clearly, I was just lucky buy it at the right time.


Am I suggesting a HDB flat is a depreciating asset like owning a car in Singapore. Yes. The key difference is a 99 year lease is way longer than a 10 year COE. So there are more chances for owners to land themselves at the right place, right time to profit from their leases transfer. Remember, it was the COE appreciation that made money for me. When you make money from selling a HDB flat, your profit comes from transferring your lease ownership that appreciates faster than its yearly depreciation to your buyer. The yearly depreciation of your flat is constant but the appreciation is subjected to valuation by buyers in the open market. One reason why the value of your HDB flat has been rising is the demand/supply equilibrium is tilted towards demand. I've explain how demand has been controlled by the HDB in the previous post [link] by implementing the BTO scheme. The second reason is the illogical behavior of HDB buyers in the open market.


Many Singaporeans do not factor in depreciation of the HDB flat. Many have no qualms buying a 40 year old HDB flat, paying the same price of its 20 year newer counterpart on the opposite street. One reason is that most of us will not live in the house for more than 50 years. We will never live to see the end of our 99 year lease. Still, it doesn't make any sense. Would you be paying the same price for a 2 and 5 year old car because you will be selling them at the 7th year? No way. That is because no buyer is going to pay you the same price for an older car. Why are flat buyers willing to pay premium prices for a very old flat then? Most of us still think the government will bail us out in the end. Due to the fact it has been done before, we believe the government will give us a good 'en bloc' package or a good placing in a SERS somewhere at great price. Trading in or whatsoever. That might have been a possibility when old flats were few and far between. Remember what they said about the problems of an aging population, where a large percentage of the population ages and the working population is insufficient to support them? Think about what happens when the bulk of our flats are aging. To date, there is no talk about addressing the problem. What  we can be cock sure about, HDB will expect their lease holders to honour the contract. The next generation be given nothing for a flat that we think will be worth more than a million today.


Khaw called this arrangement "an appreciating asset" and is "certainly better than not owning anything." He isn't wrong, if we play our cards right. But bear in mind that amazing housing bull run in the 2010s happens once in a blue moon. It will be a folly to expect our flats to give a similar performance in the near future. Currently, what we are doing is playing musical chairs in an illogical market with a clear advantage - we know when the music is going to stop. But for the poor sods of the next generation, they will be left holding the bag when the party ends. 


Sure, I can agree with Khaw that Singaporean families are in an enviable position as compared to their counterparts in every other country. That explains why so many foreigners have tried gotten a Singapore citizenships, a HDB flat, profited, renounced their citizenships, take the money home to pay up for their 2 houses with change to spare, 1 house to live in, 1 house to rent out. Meanwhile, Singaporeans are trapped in their highly valued flats, with CPF below the minimum sum, nothing to withdraw at retirement age. An enviable position indeed.
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What's worse than jiak liao bee politicians? Jiak liao bee politicians who cannot keep their mouth shut. In general, Singaporeans are not very good in dealing with hard truths. There will be times where politicians have to say things that we don't like to hear but quite often, it isn't about facing hard truths but pure bullshit.


In an interview conducted last week (13 Aug) at the Singapore Botanic Gardens, National Development Minister Khaw Boon Wan dismissed critics who feel that housing is unaffordable in Singapore.

Mr Khaw said in a straightforward response, “The bottomline is this: 80, 90 per cent of Singaporeans own their homes. If they are not affordable, then how do you achieve such an outcome?”

“Having an appreciating asset is certainly better than not owning anything. Fifty years of continuous progress and compulsory saving through the Central Provident Fund and home ownership have put Singaporean families in an enviable position as compared to their counterparts in almost every other country. This is a legacy which we should appreciate and treasure.”


In the past, HDB builds flats in advance by forecasting housing needs. Our parents were able to find new flats when they needed one. The location of new flats may not be their top choices, at least there were always a supply available. Then came the financial crisis in the late 90s. By the early 2000s, many HDB flats were built but there were no takers. It was a mistake that prompted HDB to come out with the BTO system. Perhaps coincidentally, HDB prices shot up since. Many flat owners who bought at the right time saw the value of their flat doubled. The nation celebrated yet another shrewd policy by the PAP government. Everyone was happy, until their children grew up and needed flats themselves.


The BTO system forced a lot of families to look into the open market due to 2 main disadvantages. First, getting a BTO flat is a lottery. It may take one try in the balloting system to get it or it can take multiples. In real life, the latter can easily translate to 2-4 human years. Second, even after winning the lottery, HDB typically takes another 3-4 years to build your flat. Thus it takes 3 - 8 years for a family to move into their BTO flat, depending on their luck. Many couples who could not wait that long were forced to enter the open resale market. This pushes the prices of resale flats up, which in turn pushes the prices of BTO flats up because our good ex Minister Mah Bow Tan thought pegging BTO prices to the resale market was fair. SGZ HDB flat owners continued to celebrate their rising HDB flat prices while chiding their children for being too selective in taking up any jobs. Singaporeans allowed that travesty to carry on for a decade. That decade was the beginning of the end for me.


In 2011, Khaw Boon Wan took over Mah Bow Tan as the Minister of National Development and hastily de-link BTO flat prices from the resale market in a hush hush manner. It was only reported in 2013 [link] after BTO flat prices have "stablised". The MND has failed Singaporeans big time but have the cheek to claim credit for solving the problem they created.


Today, Minister Khaw has the cheek to claim HDB flats are affordable and justified it this way, “The bottomline is this: 80, 90 per cent of Singaporeans own their homes. If they are not affordable, then how do you achieve such an outcome?” I suppose until Singaporeans are literally starving on the streets, we will never be able to claim that food is getting unaffordable every year. We have to make a clear distinction here, unlike food consumption, Singaporeans "owned" their HDB flats by getting in debt. I wouldn't say for sure that something is affordable if you need to sink into a 30 year debt for. Unless Minister Khaw is able to present facts that current HDB flat buyers;

1) pay up their flats at an average age close to owners of 10, 20 years ago
2) take up loan that of the same or lower percentage to the family income
3) makes up the same or lower number of single-income families compared to the past
4) do not default on HDB loans more often than past data,


how can he continue to claim HDB flats are still affordable? Who defines the point where HDB flats become unaffordable to ordinary Singaporeans? Are Singaporeans going to make another fatal mistake by accepting arduous claims like that? 


Lest we forget, HDB flats are public housing. In other parts of the world, public housing is also known as social housing or community housing. In Western Australia, public housing is income tested. I will not even be qualified for public housing here even if I earn 50% less (Note: Despite the well known fact I am a pissed poor peasant). As property prices in Perth is also unaffordable these days due to the mining boom which caused a similar property prices spike in the last 7 years, many of us can still manage to buy a decent property here. Though unaffordable (pretty much like HDB flat prices), at least these are private houses on a freehold land.


In Singapore, only 10% of Singaporeans are able to afford a private property. Only in Singapore, the government is so proud that 90% of their native population live in public housing. Only in Singapore, the people can accept the fact that living as tenants under a 99 year lease agreement is affordable living; then  complain we have nothing much to leave behind for our children or grandchildren. Lately, we found that we don't even have enough for ourselves, because it seems that we have been paying up rental using our life savings in the CPF.
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Hi Nix

I m VL from singapore, and again like many of your readers, I have been reading your blog to prepare myself and family for our move to mel next year.
I am a stay at home mum with 4 girls (aged 11 to 14 month old) and hubby is sole breadwinner. Our plan may be girls and myself will move over in jan (sch starts 3rd week of jan I think) and hubby to join in April.
I understand that singaporean mum D and M also made the shift with their children first, so I like to learn from their experience of the daily challenges in the new environment.
If they r willing, you are welcome to give them my email address or I could write to them...
By the way, thanks for your well written sharing on guilt ridden migration. 
Have a good weekend.
Warm regards
V



Hi V,

Singaporean mum M does not wish to reveal her identity or contact so I will respect her decision. However, she gave you a reply which I will post below. You are welcome to write to her if you have further questions. I will help you relay the message to her.


From Singaporean Mum M
I suppose my challenges will differ. I mean different ppl will have different issues in the new environment. My main challenge is myself... My own fears, stereotypical views and the lack of faith in self and my child at times. The challenge is to change my stereotypical perspectives and just take the leap of faith.  
The usual challenges of finding accommodation, school and transport I feel, can be taken care off with much organization, time and money. A lot of these should be sorted out before you move the whole clan.  
Challenges with school really boils down to what you want and expect for the children. If you are not picky, find the school nearest to home. Or home nearest to the school with confirmed places for your children.

I have 1 child so that's obviously v different compared to managing 4 kids. I don't know how ppl do it, but it amazes me! Have faith in your child/children, believe that they can be good and independent and helpful.

Also I think it's important to get some real help and advice from someone in the area. A real person who can assist and point you in the right direction will be awesome. Nix, Jen and a very good friend Jolene were my panel of advisers when I first made my move and for that, I am forever grateful.

I Always do my homework... It isn't a challenge for me coz I'm OCD with planning but some might find this a challenge. :) Try your best to gel with others in the new environment. Try not to compare.. It's tough not to compare your current and past experiences... But try! It's also hard not to miss home (yet another challenge)... And obviously It's tough luck meeting the right ppl, let alone the right kind of friends. But God has his ways of paving the way for you. So heck the worries!

There will be heaps and heaps of obstacles, foggy roads, bumpy terrains and shaky bridges to cross. And I think the biggest challenge is really me... And if wanna am willing to take the leap of faith. It is still a constant challenge for me despite spending couple of years here now.... It is still a lot of learning and adapting to the way of life here, accepting things as they are. 3 decades of my life in sing will not disappear in a mere 2-3 years so everyday is a challenge itself.

Take heart, you'll get there, adapt and be glad you took the leap of faith! Cheers!

/Singaporean Mum, M


I'll add a bit for your benefit, these were my observations from the two Singaporean Mums M and D, particular the areas that seemed to make them wail. Although a "study mama" has the financial and moral support of her husband, the reality is that she has to run the family as if she is a divorcee. The key differences are there is someone to rant to at the end of the day and the spiritual support he can provide. But so does talking to god. That perhaps explains why Singaporean M will blabber about her Higher Being whenever she was overwhelmed with what life threw at her. 


The similarity between living away from the husband and devoting to god is that, neither of them is going to help you screw a nut on when you most need it. Fortunately though, both will eventually guide you (usually when your house is floating on water) to the solution. One will tell you who to call, the other will "bring the people to you." In a nutshell, there is no differentiation between "man work" or "woman work". If it needs to get done, it's your work.


All of a sudden, you need to be an expert in selecting a used car. You have to know where to switch on that switch that jumped after a short circuit. You will have to inspect the water tank or the gas heater to see what are wrong with them. You will need to sort out how to, somehow, move furniture using metaphysical talents. Well of course, if you are well stocked in the bank, that usually solves a lot of problems. In fact, if you have several million bucks stashed somewhere, you probably don't need a husband. Regardless, you will have to be both the father and mother to your children. As far as I know, Skype doesn't come with a Hug Function. In fact, in my opinion at least, Skype probably makes thing worse. Imagine if you are hungry someone gives you a picture of a burger that can emit flavour of the real thing but you can eat it. The biggest challenge is playing the role of both parents, followed by day-to-day surprises. 


I don't mean to scare you but these are real life observations of some of the challenges I saw these women had to handle. That being said, even the weakest woman will gain strength from the love of her children and overcome her odds. There were many who walked the same path before you and eventually found the way. So will you.




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I have no idea why Stephen do not sub contract bricklaying work to do as a sideline. He told me he was "lazy" and do not like to be the "boss." Steph confided that he would rather be a worker, so that he has no other responsibilities outside his daily work. He was not wrong. A bricklayer brings no work home, knocks off on time and answers to no one as long as he goes his work right. If Steph is to take on mini projects on his own, he will have a reputation to upkeep, customers to please, to provide services to impress and a lot of planning to do.


From time to time, Steph would ask me to consider going into the trade, get myself trained up and take up some jobs on my own. He would then be more than happy to support me as a skilled tradesman. That would be counter-productive and silly. For one, I'm not sure if he realised it at all, much as he dislike being the boss, Steph has all the qualities being one. He has the necessary skills, personality and network to do this sort of thing well but his reluctance went on for these few years.


Not sure why but lately I heard Steph has been taking up some smallish projects. Almost every Saturday morning he would drive his Ford Explorer and brick up some places for somebody. This sort of thing is similar to trying your luck in lottery. You have to be in it to win it. When it comes to getting small jobs though, the chances are nowhere as remote as winning lottery. In fact, if the job is well done often enough, the chances of a referral is high. The more good jobs he completes in his own name, the more often job requests will come. If Steph keeps up at this, eventually he will be offered something significant enough to put him in the dilemma doing it full time or not. I call that a happy problem, if it comes.


This week I received a call from the big man. He wanted me to do the labouring job for his new Saturday work. Several times in the past, Steph remarked over the phone, “你可以的吗?” (You can or not one?) I could almost imagine him looking up and down to my scrawny frame. His reservations were not without basis. There isn't an inch on me that looks like a brickie. Yet I survived 1 year of intensive work in the steel factory as a TA. Every night felt like a double gym session. The last time I checked, the density of steel is higher than bricks.


As I was taking a pee at work, I looked up and saw tiny flies struggling by the window. Those were not the pesky bush flies, which normally arrive in the city in mid Spring. Just some tiny ones that looked like fruit flies. They appeared to be snared by some dust or fine threads invisible to my eyes. Even the spiders have reappeared from hibernation and began spinning their candy floss to lure silly flies. Perhaps it is time for me to work. I suspect Steph's job doesn't really need 2 manpower to finish up his job. He just wanted to get my butt up and do some work. He even offered to pay me. I hope he will tell me how much he quoted for the job. I will not be taking the money if he doesn't make enough from the job. If I learn something from it, I'll pay my school fees with my services.


On the eve of Stephen's birthday, he put up an awful sounding rhyme on Facebook

Today I learnt to lay bricks
I discovered i was not quick

I follow Stephen's lead
Later will come the speed

Concentrate on ten mills joints
There are so many points

Level plumb keep it clean
Keep it straight it mustn't lean

I want to be an apprentice
So i will get better at this


It is probably written for his students. Cheesy as it sounds, that is the mentality I will adopt for Saturday.
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There is a good 2 weeks to go on the calendar before Winter ends. Generally, as a rule of thumb Spring starts in September. 


I knew it the moment I drew my blinds and opened my door wide to greet the Sunday morning. The temperature might have been cold for Singapore's standards but I did not feel that tinge, that familiar slight sting that pierce through whatever fabric threw on myself every morning at 5.30am when I leave for work. I stood at the balcony for a few minutes without filching. Like the previous year, Spring came early. As far as I'm concerned, Winter 2015 is over.


True enough for the next few days, I was able to walk barefoot on tiled floors and wear shorts at home. Getting into bed at night do not make me shiver for a couple of minutes anymore. It's sad actually. Did 1 year just slip away from me again? The longer I stay in Perth, the faster time seems to move. Truth to be told, I dread the end of Winter. The short daylight has been perfect for me. I have been contented with driving to work in complete darkness and watching the sunset while I cook dinner for us at 5pm. Nearly every type of insect that annoys me disappear during these 3 months. Since Winter is Perth isn't really that cold (we probably had only a couple of zero degrees this time around), no insects, no door to door salespeople and no invitation to mass BBQs, it never fail to deliver 3 months of peace and quiet for me.


However since the 2nd year in Perth, the end of Winter always mean I had to visit the hospital to check my cancer status. If I get to live another year or I'm fucked. You will never understand the feeling unless you are in a similar situation.
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This is one of the unlikely topics here. I wouldn't know where to fit it if I didn't resonate so much with it. A few weeks ago, I asked my wife if she knew what to do if I die. Her response made me worry. Like I guessed, her optimistic nature probably had her never thought I would leave her one day, at least, in the premature manner that I wanted to prepare her for. After all, I am the higher risk one between us. There is no telling if cancer will return and take me down one day. I'm carrying a time bomb without a timer. On any other day I may be crushed to death at work. At least that sounds like a fast death. If it is to be a painfully slow one that leaves me too weak to live, too strong to die, will she support me if I want to go in dignity?


I wish she would spend some time to think over what she should do if I die unexpectedly. It would be painful to go, knowing she would be distraught, completely lost and didn't know what to do next. Perhaps one day I should write a guide for her, a private post. Just for her eyes. 


GUEST BLOGGER
Encik G
12 Aug 2015


The Last Cab to Darwin which is showing in (Australian) cinemas at the moment tells of a man who has been given 3 months to live and embarks on an epic drive through the Australian outback from Broken Hill to Darwin to die. Core to the theme of the movie is the idea of euthanasia, the right to die.


I support euthanasia, perhaps I see too much death but do spare me the religious argument unless you see death on a weekly basis. There is no dignity in dying when one has cancer that has spread throughout the body and all I can do is help manage or relief any pain you may have. After all admitting terminally ill patients into palliative care and hospice before their death is a form of "slow death" anyway.


As another lady puts it, watching her husband Bob die of prostate cancer was a distressing experience.


"The worst thing about looking after somebody who is very ill and in pain is that you can't do anything about it. I would have taken some of his pain for him if I could have, but I was even afraid to hug him. Tests had shown his bones were ready to crumble because the cancer had moved into his bones, so hearty hugs were not in the picture anymore."


In 1996, Bob Dent became the first person to die using the Northern Territory's Rights of the Terminally Ill Act.


Ive been an organ donor since I was 22 and if anything is still useful on my death bed, feel free to grab it. If I lived till 80-90yr and had a stoke which rendered me parapeglic and have to survive with a tube through my nose sustaining me with liquid food, I want to be able to go on my own terms. But rather than grief death, why dun we celebrate its life, and I say this after hearing some great and funny stories at funerals of the life lived.


So what of the life lived? I've travelled (most of) the world, met some amazing people along the way. Completed a marathon, triathlon and climbed the French Alps and Pyrenees on a bicycle. Taking part in 24hr bike races in close to sub zero degree temperatures in Canberra. And love to relive some of the good old army day stories. Being in a close knit community, I have also become friends with some of my patients including some of the kids with type 1 diabetes. I will be the 'fun' uncle that never seems to work to my nieces and nephew ( they ask my sis when I seemingly get home before 5 each day)


Perhaps the PAP should also consider euthanasia as a policy option as central to their argument of a 6.9million population target is the need to service the older population.



As the movie description go.. “..before you can end your life, you have to live it..”, and being human, its normal to crave the familiar as routines can be comforting but to live life you have to sometimes venture out of your comfort zone. The only problem is I doubt the Government will release your CPF even if you show them the date you are dying on.
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Wrote about fuel situation in Perth before. I am pretty sure many of you don't understand what I wrote at all. I distinctively remember describing how things work here to Tucky before but lately, I had to explain it all over again. The way fuel is sold here is so different from what we were used to in Singapore.


In Perth, the fuel prices offered to the public at just 1 same kiosk can vary by as much as 30% from the cheapest to the dearest day of the week. For example, one particular kiosk may be offering lowest range unleaded at $1.14 on Monday and $1.49 on Friday. Nobody likes to pay extra, not to mention a whopping 35c extra for every litre you fill. Say if you fill a full tank of 50 litres on the worst possible day, you will be paying $17.50 more compared on the best possible day. Perhaps this may be small change to many of you but to some others, it can be used to buy that last piece of SG50 collectible. Never underestimate how little bits add up.


And that's just 1 kiosk! It doesn't matter what brand of fuel the station is carrying. As far as prices are concern, it seems like a case of every man for himself. So if you visit 10 different Shell stations on the same day, you'll probably see 10 different prices. Lately, it seems there was talk about fuel "price wars." I haven't seen anything spectacular yet, unlike half a year ago when I was filling it up at close to $1 per litre. Thankfully, I can still fill around $1.1x lately. Can't complain about that. It could be worse. Anyway, the volatile prices across so many fuel kiosks here see the need for Fuelwatch. That website basically points to consumers where to get the cheapest fuel for the day. By that, I mean 30c-40c cheaper than the most expensive kiosk for the day. Worth a check whenever the tank looks low. If any kiosk is nearby, it's filling time. 


The first time I came across a concept like Fuelwatch was actually before I moved to Perth. I am trying not to laugh but Singapore has its own Fuelwatch and that was where I first knew about it. But seriously, what's the fucking point? The prices are almost the same everyday, every brand, every station. For example, look at the chart below (not fuelwatch but similar)


3c? And these folks update like.... once every 2-3 weeks? Price wars? Nah, prefer holding hands and singing folk songs. Raise price to $3/L Singaporeans will also continue to drive car lah, tio bo? War for what?
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Want to persuade Ah Ma to move to JB also no need to bring so many people along right?


There is a little known fact that I had been a "Com.Srv Director" during my school days. I have been so shy about that even my wife does not know this secret. When Ah Liam told me about it, I asked him, "Simi lai eh?" I just wanted a non-committal ECA (CCA) to hide myself in, so that the school authorities would leave me alone. Ah Liam promised me joining the Interact Club was the best lobang. So I did. He wasn't wrong. There was no uniform, no marching. No playing chess with nerds (Nerds didn't react well beaten by my ilks) Not bad.


Later on I realised I was arrowed to be in charged of all community service activities of the club. Oddly enough, it was probably the best thing I would rather do as compared to other roles. From painting old folks' home to playing clowns at orphanages, we did that for that few years. I would never recall a scene in an old folk's home though, where 4 or 5 of us would parade round an Ah Ma, bend awkwardly to her eye level, smile sweetly like as if she was the hottest babe in school and present her items that looked like 2 piles of shit. Trust me, those wouldn't be too useful to Ah Ma, unless those were ear muffs, for her immediate use to filter out any crap that she would need to listen to until all the wayang ended. Neither had we gotten photographers at every direction, ready to snap the best photograph for the club's magazine. Most, if not all of us would point our middle fingers at photographers who tried taking a candid shot so that they couldn't use the pic in our unglamorous poses. Most importantly, when it came to community service, the last thing we (or at least I) wanted was recognition. If you expect recognition, you don't understand what community service is all about. The bunch of men above probably thought public service equals to community service; and that it was a good idea to pay a visit to a home to pose for pictures that made them look really good for the coming GE.


It really didn't, for those with a pair of working eyes at least. The picture looks more like nominees of the Mediacrop Best Actor Award with 5 lead actors starring in the same blockbuster. 


My comments and ratings:

Amrin Amin: *** (3 stars)
Comments: Surprisingly good performance by a new comer but still raw. We look forward to his future projects.

Vikram "Saving children lives equals to National Service" Nair: * (1 star)
Comments: Not too good. Tired smile. Didn't bother to bend his back. 

"Send you parents to JB" Khaw: **** (4 stars)
Comments: Well rehearsed smile which almost doesn't look nauseating. Artfully holding shit looking thing at camera's angle instead of Ah Ma's line of sight. Had to hold in there in a thigh splitting angle at 35 degrees for 30 minutes for the shot. Veteran.

"Dignity" Lim Wee Kiak: ** (2 stars)
Comments: Weak posture, requiring support of arms to maintain posture. Eye contact weak. Unconvincing display.

"Backdoor" Ong: **** (5 stars)
Comments: Ong Ye Kung must be the first ever candidate who failed to get through via a GRC backdoor. That must have given him a lot of motivation to do well. Half knelt and holding Ah Ma's hand, gazing dreamily into her eyes. If you need Backdoor Ong to propose to Ah Ma and give her a kiss, he would do it. World class acting.


Verdict:
Winner: "Backdoor" Ong will clinch the Best Actor Award, and later getting into Parliament with his team as well, through the backdoor of course.





















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Since end of July, I imposed a self exile from the Internet highway, hiding in a little known corner of the cyberworld known as the HOTLIII, where I spent a good month playing this MUD full time. No more logins to Facebook, checking emails or anything during this period, since 95% of the stuff hoarding new feeds would make me puke dinner. As I am a pissed poor peasant, I cannot afford such things from happening too often. In Perth, it isn't going to be something like taking the lift down and buying a packet of $2.50 (or whatever price it is now) chicken rice and filling up the gap here. "Outside meals" can cost quite a bit. Yeah, asingaporeanson cannot even afford to eat out. What poor standard of living he has in Australia. So please do not consider migrating to Australia. It is important to put such things down as a disclaimer, lest it gives some brainfarters the excuses to take cheap pot shots at me. (I'll come to you soon, I promise. And you're not going to like it.)


All the SG50 shit was nauseating. I wish I wasn't saying this in my position because the first thing anyone will bring out is my overseas status. If only anyone realises my geographical position has nothing to do with anything. I am a Singaporean, I hold a red passport and the fact I am working overseas doesn't not make me less red than you. The next thing you will say is that, if I hate Singapore so much, why not fuck off from Singapore? Singaporeans will be more than happy to see the likes of me gone. I have done so and the feelings are mutual. Now the customaries have been established, I'll repeat: All the SG50 shit was nauseating. You just couldn't understand how stupid everything looked. On a side note, many people contacted me and asked me my views on the GE round the corner. "This time, it will be different," they said. What a laugh. I simply told these deluded fellows to look at their Facebook feeds. One slogan was enough to get everyone spellbound. SG50. Simi lanjiao also SG50. 


Less than half a year ago, Singaporean zombies (SGZ) were up in arms lamenting about dropping construction standards, higher cost of living and malfunctioning infrastructure. SG50. Ooooh, I'm so proud of what we achieved. AIMS, Brompton, Mas Selamat, pondings, anarchic vandalism. Deep cracks, big signs of incompetent leadership, they said. SG50. Ahhhhh, they bought us to where we are. SGZ will never learn. Never. To you hopeful folks who attempted to sound positive, my message to you : Dream on.


"My love for my country has nothing to do with the ruling party. PAP is PAP, Singapore is Singapore," they said. Yeah right. So do explain why you throw a vote for the party who threatens you with the withdrawal of constituency upgrading funds if it falls into opposition hands. Love for the country, my ass. Besides, according to Facebook feeds, SGZ's love of the country roughly falls under these few categories:


Fireworks

So they said they doubled the budget for fireworks for SG50. That explained why fireworks pictures appeared twice as much as last year on Facebook feeds. You see these fiery glitters everywhere. I don't have a problem with fireworks but I wondered if anyone realises fireworks are meant to be enjoyed live, as it was performed. Yet DBZs were busily clicking non stop on their expensive cameras and post their pictures in Facebook later captioned, "What a great display, my best fireworks experience ever!" If clicking throughout the show was their best ever, they must have fallen asleep during the previous ones. I even saw a tense exchange between 2 SGZ arguing whose fireworks photograph is better. SGZ loves fireworks much.


Weapons

Another way SGZ proclaim our love of the country was to caption their love declaration to pictures of war weapons they captured on cameras. "I'm so proud to be Singaporean." It convinced me that the government should have really spent less on weapons and more on education. Not that it will make much difference, I suspect.


Collections

It all began with pictures of Funpacks, or whatever they call it. Basically, things they will never use again after Aug 2015, other than whatever can be consumed. This year, they managed to play keep SGZ engrossed by using the aged trick, giving up collectibles. Collecting. That's the 4th most popular national past time after making money, queuing up and shopping. SGZ won't stop until they complete their full collection. Then they spend 1 minute to admire their work, keep it and wonder what else to collect next. SGZ loves collect much. I know that very well.


Buildings

Post a picture of building, captioned, "We have come so far!" Oddly enough, none of building pictures posted up contain any human beings. Just buildings. Objects. Symbols. Logos. Slogans. Why didn't anyone post a picture of this?



or this


Not looking pretty anymore once you look into everyday living, yeah?


So what's the big deal about the number 50? Because we survived for 50 years without resources? Yes I get it. Great feat, no doubt about it but what's there to celebrate specifically about the 50th year? Have we finally put away enough money in the reserves that will yield us enough income from investments to give Singaporeans free medical and education? How does your life improve after 9th August 2015? And why won't we have the same amount of fireworks the next year on SG51? Shouldn't we be celebrating harder, surviving 1 more year after 50? So is anyone anticipating that SG51 fish cake in glee? How about 51g more bacon? Nah. No one gives a damn about life 51, it's not gonna be as special as 50 you know. But why? Stupidity requires no explanation.
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Albany's Quotes

"Daddy, my promise is

painful."
-

Albany showing me her pinkie

"Let's go to the park of living

room."
- she

led me, as she pulled her toy pram along

"A-P-R-I-C-O-

T."
- Albany,

15/8/2015

"Tax."
-Albany, after taking part of the dessert she

served me to her plate, leaving me open mouthed in

disbelief.

"I will hug

you tightly so you cannot go."
-grabbing my arms with both hands

while trying to fall asleep. 25/11/2015

"Daddy, don't get injured at

work."
-

Albany, 3 years old

"Daddy, I love you. Because you cook yummy lunch

and dinner."
-

Albany, 14/2/2016

"Mummy, why are these called shorts?

They look long to me."
- Albany, 20/2/2016

"You

are the best daddy in the world because you did these (pointed to

the house renovations)
- Albany, 1/5/2016

"I left the door unlocked so that you can come in because I love you so much."
- Albany, 21/11/2016

Emails 2017

Hi Nix,

I came across your interesting blog and wish to ask on your honest opinion.

Do you think it's a good idea to pay 6 months worth of house rental in advanced to secure a place to stay before we go over. Our situation makes it a little difficult to look for one in Darwin with 2 dogs that we couldn't leave behind. And we don't have a job there yet. Oh, we have gotten a 489 visa. And we are intending to move somewhere in June with our 2 dogs and an almost 2 year old kid.

Appreciate your intake on this.

Thanks a lot!

Hi Elaine,


The housing market is currently quite depressed so it should not be difficult to find rental properties. I don't think it is a good idea to pay 6 months in advance at all. You shouldn't find it a problem to get one. If you face any difficulties, let me know the details and see if I can give you ideas.


Hi,

Saw your blog while searching on Singaporean based overseas and hopeful can meet a bunch of you all if i ever go over eventually.

For myself after looking at migrating or completing the process before i do not have enough points to qualify.

Basing on my current situation, it seems since my CV is leaning towards the marketing and financial field. Which in this case seems only Adelaide and Darwin is the only option for Subclass 190.

Do you know any fellow Singaporeans based in either place?

Anyway, for me is more towards wanting a more laid back life and changing the environment. Ideal situation would be to work another 10 years before settling with a small farm land in the country in Aussie. But my worry is whether i would be able to secure a job in Aussie especially with my advance in age 38?

Lastly, any good advice for a frog in the well on his migration journey to aussie?

Many thanks in advance

Regards

Stanley

Hi Stanley,

If you cannot qualify for skilled migration on points, you will not be able to work here, unless you find an employer who is willing to hire you for your skill set and apply for a work visa for you. It is unlikely in this economic climate but may be your only chance.


Dear NIx,

Good day!

I have been reading your blog and decided to migrate to Australia.

I have been researching on how to go about migrating to Australia and unfortunately, I seem to have hit a road block, thus writing this email to seek your advice on which type of visa should i apply.

I will be turning 36 next year. BE Chemical Engineering from UNSW (Stayed in Sydney for 2.5 years and graduated in 2008). Msc in Maritime Studies from NTU (Graduating in June 2017). Currently working as a Business Development Manager in the Shipping Industry. I have also attached my CV for your reference.

I am confident of getting 60 points in the Points Test BUT my current job is not on the SOL list.

My mother's cousin is a PR in Australia and she and her family are living in Perth (I do not know whether this information helps)

I was thinking of taking part time courses in ITE in Electrical Wiring, Residential Plumbing or Air Conditioning and Refrigeration since these jobs are on the SOL list.

Any advice will be really appreciated.


Regards,
Colin Soh

Dear Colin,

First thing first, I would like to know how you qualify for 60 points in the Points Test. Will you be able to provide a breakdown ?

*Please note that if your occupation is not on the SOL, you will not be able to claim points for work experience nor academic qualifications.


Hey buddy!

Was scrolling through and landed on your site. Loved the Art of Survival; plain, blunt yet simple.

I'm a local Sporean dude and just got my PR. Currently workin on contract job and planning to move down under. I realise getting a job in Oz from Spore isn't gonna be easy. Thought of giving it a try since its been just a month. Plan B is to just move and get an unpaid internship for 3 mths. Any advise?

Kind regards,
Hi dude,

To be honest, I don't have a single clue about unpaid internship or anything like that. If you manage to get one of those, I will appreciate if you can let us know the details so we can all learn from you.


I apologise for being painfully obvious but if you find it hard to find a job in Australia from Singapore, then come here and look!


Hello,

My name is Adam and I cam across your blog about migrating to Australia. I would love some advice or experience that you can share with me with regards to my questions.

First of all, I am a US bachelor grad in Mechanical Engineering and worked in the US for 2.5 years. I am a Chinese Malaysian and I'm 25 years old by March (2017). Do you have any ideas or suggestions on migrating to Australia? The subclass 189 doesn't allow me to accumulate enough points because of my work experience did not meet the requirement of 3 years which I was told that usually the Australia immigration officer pay the most attention to. If you disagree with that statement, I would like to hear your advice on that.

The other way I thought is by studying my Masters degree there and while studying, I could think of an idea to set up a business there. Didn't research much into this path but if you have experience with this path, I appreciate a lot if you are willing to share.

Thank you very much and hope to hear from you soon,
Regards,
Adam

Hi Adam,

It sounds really simple. Choose the path of least resistance. Work for 3 years to gain your 60 points then! You'll need the funds to relocate anyway.


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