A Singaporean In Australia

Hi Nix,

Pardon for taking my own sweet time to reply to your reply of my questions. Been pre-occupied with too many stuff lately. First thing first. Yeah, the nick that i gave myself the last few seconds before i press the "send" button sounds a tad sissy after i re-read my email the second time, but alas, what is done is done.

I may be wrong but I can sense some bitterness in you towards sg current political happenings even though you have physcially detached yourself from it. It's like your ex-girlfriend who you found out she is getting married - she is no longer part of your life but everytime you heard news about her, it somehow manage to generate negative feelings in you. Nothing wrong in that. Ultimately we are still singaporeansons no matter what you colour of passport is now - we have the right to hold our own opinion. I have my take on sg terrible political situation but i will leave it for another day.

Yes, my biggest worry is my wife and my 2 kids. I don't doubt her motherly love towards our children, but her ability to take care of them without much external help alone, in a foreign country. Securing a job: yup i am willing to dig deep, as long as its not catching moths or 卖屁股 lol.

How is Jen copng so far? Did she have any burnout so far? Besides encouraging her to attend playgroups once or twice a week, what have you done to help share the burden? I don't have the problem of clicking "likes" as i don't own a facebook account. Even though i don't buy the idea of facebook, i may create one in the near future just to keep in touch with my close friends. Accommodation and choosing suburbs - i will think about it after i gotten my grant. Thanks for offering your spare room for our family, very much appreciated. I will keep this option open.

Moths. Butterfly. 傻傻分不清. To be frank, i have no idea when or why i develop such a dislike for moths. But its such a convenient way to put the blame on a SBC show. To me, that will do.

Have a great week ahead.

Rdgs,

(Sounds sissy but not a sissy) Liverbirdie

Hi Liverbirdie,

No, I don't feel anymore bitterness towards Singapore. In 2 months' time I will have been in Perth for 5 years. The past 5 years have been the most peaceful period of my life. That is enough for any residual resentment to subside. These days, I look back and have a laugh at myself (as well as the others. Hmm. Mainly the others and the irony in things lately. My passport is still red. But I have given up hope in the possibility of returning to a kind of society I want to live in. Meanwhile, the majority of our countrymen are happy with the ongoing, evident from the last GE results. I don't want to commit my energies into making or hoping for change. By no means changing my life by moving to a new country is easy. At least, it is still a possibility, as I am proving.

If you wife cannot cope with taking care of two children, then you have to rope in in some areas, such as grocery shopping, food preparation (not necessarily cooking), cleaning the house etc. The vast majority of the households here go without a domestic helper. Many (especially migrants) are without help from family members. It is time to dig into the old school ways of relying on the community (neighbours and friends) like how our mothers did in the 70s, 80s in Singapore.

Jen is coping well, with occasional mental breakdowns. What doesn't kill her makes her stronger, I guess. I help her out by bathing the girl, cooking meals (every meal is home cooked), washing dishes and making getting the kids to bed. Lately I have began to bath the baby and spoon feeding him, since he is old enough to eat some solids. The only thing I do not help her with is the laundry. One helpful thing is to learn how not to view these tasks as a burden. You probably did not notice and have subconsciously written that term because these are the typical tasks that Singaporeans will like to outsource to helpers or the grandparents as much as possible. Perhaps the living environment in Perth allows me to actually appreciate - and to be grateful - for the chance to do these for my family. It may sound ridiculous to you but if you ever get to live such a lifestyle, maybe you will understand this one day.

All the best. I wish you and your birdies well.

asingaporeanson