I did it again.
This is the second time I deleted my facebook account. I would like to apologise to Ms Ang Jia Qin because she created the last account for me. I felt touched at her gesture and feel bad about this. I'm sure she will not hold it against me. Though we haven't knew each other for a long time, I know she (somewhat) understands I am the kind of unstable weirdo she will never understand completely and she accepts that (I think), thus we have a good friendship - long may it continues. She's a great friend.
In fact if it wasn't Jia Qin who created this account for me, I'll be 'faceless' since, well, the last time I deleted my original account. I held on to the account she created until it long outlived the original purpose of it - to interact with my new neighbours in a group. After the initial period of hi-byes, I do not communicate with anyone there anymore. No one communicates with me either. I faded away just as in reality, most of these newly-made friends erased memories of my existence.
Not that I really mind. I've lived long enough to know that some friends come and go. Some friends will always be there. Some go when they get hitched. Some return to your life after a while. As a friend, I've learnt to welcome friends when they come and never hold on to them when they need to go. I value all my friends and I thought of them often, even distant friends who have absolutely no idea that they still turn up in my thoughts now and then, especially during my mundane grueling work when my mind roams to dark crevices of my memories.
I found the decision making process of deleting my facebook account similar to migration. There are so many pros and cons that anyone will be immobilised trying to weigh them. Well to most, there is hardly a single negative about having a facebook account. I'll not discuss about this in detail. It didn't take long for me to make the decision. Just 5 minutes in fact, when a friend uploaded a picture I was in. It's exactly the same reason why I deleted my first account. I want to thank this friend who did that, because he made me act fast instead of procrastinated it further.
With facebook eliminated from my routine, I gain a little more life and of course something I value most - my privacy. It has a good side effect as well. This blog will therefore receive less viewership in time to come as I will not be able to share my posts anymore. Some of my friends, eg. Larry Yeo, clicks on my facebook shares often. Without my shares, that routine will be out of his habit in no time too. With less people reading, I will eventually bring the blog to a meaningful close. My original goal was to end my migration story when Chocolate, my beloved Jack Russel Terrier, joins me in Perth to completed our dreams. That will not come true anymore. The blog is floating in limbo, aimless for now.
Many times I contemplated retiring from blogging (after just half a year hey-ho!), but I received emails from folks telling me not to. When I eventually stop writing as the readership dwindled to the last trickle, I'll gain another part of my life back. I will very much be able to 'let go' of Singapore as many readers have urged me frustratingly to do so. When the day comes, I'll taunt Alvin about being able to do so first.
A blogger friend whom I made through this blog always reminded me about my readership figures against his. To be honest, I don't really care much about the figures. You can't exchange them for NTUC vouchers. Rather, I didn't want to disappoint those who reads my blog everyday. I don't really believe them when they say that. Come on, no one even reads the Straits Times every single day. The benefit of doubt has to be given though, my wife for one reads my blog everyday. The blog has became an unlikely channel for her to understand me better as I put my twisted chain of thoughts into words.
When I asked Jen to log in to her facebook account and search for my username, she asked, "Why? Regret already ah?" I laughed and replied, "No, I just want to know if I did it right. You can't find me? Great." I went to change Albany's nappy, feeling pleased. It felt as liberating as the first time.
No doubt I'll miss those silly lasses and lads for posting status updates that begs to be trolled which I obliged, of course. I tried signing up Google+ once and stopped as soon as they forced me to use my real name instead of a nickname. I have been using nicknames the day internet came into my life. So Fuck Off if Google+ wants to dictate what name I want to use. Thus, I am social-networkless today. Maybe I should sign up chillicrab and see if I could find Julia there. Heh. If I were to rejoin facebook again by strange circumstances, maybe my first friend will be Ang Jia Qin again.
Till then my email is always there, for anyone who wants to contact me.
asingaporeanson@gmail.com
Friendship is 2-way, like taking 2 hands to properly clap.
ReplyDeleteMost of the time, friends fade away from me because they do not want to keep communicating as much.
It's not that I'd stop interacting with them, but I recently learnt my lesson not to talk to people so much so often, until they enter into silence.
I'm OK with using my real name on Facebook, Twitter and Google+, and have had no problems finding people with whom I can continue to interact with.
If they're willing.
brudder... I've been reading your blog everyday ....
ReplyDeleteI will patiently wait for the day for you to taunt me. It's a good sign.
ReplyDeleteWhy? We all conscientiously made a decision to leave Singapore not because of the things we like about Singapore, but because of the things(Govt and society) that irks us most. Why then do we indulge or waste time in blogging or writing about what we came away from.
I know it is easier said than done, as I am just as guilty of writing and commenting in a few blogs and sites. Having grown up on chicken rice and chye tow kuey, I am always tempted to rebuke or air my frustration whenever I hear some stupid and cruel remarks by Lee Dynasty and its cronies.
However, I have recently resisted and am slowly writing less and less.(but some times I am so angry I just cant help it, Argh!!!!).
Here's a challenge - let's see who stop writing about the woes of Singapore first, me or you? The first one gets to taunt the other.
Here's an encouragement - Don't kill the blog, there's plenty in this world outside the red dot to write about. Keep helping the new migrant, share information, places to go, things to do, where to eat,building a new house,DIY stuffs, etc Perth is not as boring as what some people make it out to be.
Hi Alvin,
DeleteI honestly know you little, but I think I can empathise with the writing less which I'm also trying to do.
For me, I insist on maintaining the same substance even in less frequent words, and to continue reading wherever I want and can.
I'm not overseas, we're stuck here, we've far more excuses all the time to be negative, but I choose not to be so.
Local S'poreans like me may be considered not helpful to those of you over there, but I reiterate (repeat again) that I support what I can, even if only with (fewer, rarer) words than before.
Ms. Ang Jia Qin is very very sad that you deleted your FB acct.. Well, its your decision since your best-est neighbour had kpo-ly created the acct for you.. WAHAHAHHA!!
ReplyDeleteNonetheless, who cares if u have a FB acct now? We are easily connected via Whatsapp. If you ever have your 3RD acct created again, ADD ME!!! =)
I too, read your blog everyday and I'm not even Singaporean! I love to see your view on life here in Australia and the contrast to how things are done in Singapore. I am learning a lot about the little red dot and the lives of people there. I also like to follow your journey here and have great admiration for anyone who is brave enough to start life from scratch, in a new country. I hope you continue to enjoy the journey, and wish you and your family every happiness in your new country.
ReplyDeleteI read your blog more often than I do the Straits Times! haha! (and yes, the paper format of ST is available in the State Library of WA btw)
ReplyDeleteI not only enjoy your posts, but also the comments that others have made. I've learnt a lot from them too. Like the previous 'Anonymous' reader, I enjoy reading about your journey in Perth.
Anyway, if you ever do close the blog, but want to keep in contact with me, I'm only an email away...
Take care :)
you gu gu.....hahaha...why everytime i wan to chat with you in msn u offline liao!
ReplyDelete"Not that I really mind. I've lived long enough to know that some friends come and go. Some friends will always be there. Some go when they get hitched. Some return to your life after a while."
ReplyDeleteI dont ustnd whys the need to continue the blog when ur given this gift? But still of course nobody can force you to continue if you insist to. But I just guess in doing so ur the one that chose to go.
"As a friend, I've learnt to welcome friends when they come and never hold on to them when they need to go."
Your readers too... will not be in any ways able to hold on to you if u really wants to go but dont u think they are your friends too. Friends here dont talk thru phone calls but instead in the comment box.
Please dont stop champ and I wish you enjoy the rest of the wkend!
alamak... deleted again.. LOL~
ReplyDelete-Julia
Deleted or not .. it does not matter as friends of yours will not delete you in their hearts :)
ReplyDeleteLXL
I've only just seen your blog this week. I started reading from Day 1. I guess it's not just everyday but many posts each day.
ReplyDelete