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| Bibra Lake, WA |
We came in mid-Spring. It is mid-Summer now. A season worth of time just passed like that. By now friends have came to accept our departure and memories of us are slowly slipping into the abyss of oblivion. It's a price I never wanted to pay however else I prepared myself for it.
"Wish you were here," has became increasingly painful to say when you really meant it. Too frequently, I think of family and friends whenever I see really nice things here. If only they were here to share these with me. Each night I thought of my friends while driving home from work. All of them would be asleep in Singapore.
I wondered why they started telling me the same thing after I left. I was always there until I left. Still, it felt comforting to be missed, while it lasted of course.
They say we should not live in the past. Because the past doesn't exist anymore. Because you can never revisit the past. Because the only way is forward. So we should look forward and not turn back for there is nothing behind. I disagree.
I am a product of my memories. Take away my past memories, I am nothing but a shell. I know not who to love. I know not who I am. Without looking at my past, I cannot decide where I want to go in the future and what I shall do in the present to take myself there. If I do not look back, I know not the mistakes I should not make again. I know not what values that matter to me.
I'll take the past with me. So I can continue to live in the past walking the path to the future. Hopefully one day, we could all put down everything and be together again. We'll chat and chess the days away while waiting for death to claim the lasts of us.
I wondered why they started telling me the same thing after I left. I was always there until I left. Still, it felt comforting to be missed, while it lasted of course.
They say we should not live in the past. Because the past doesn't exist anymore. Because you can never revisit the past. Because the only way is forward. So we should look forward and not turn back for there is nothing behind. I disagree.
I am a product of my memories. Take away my past memories, I am nothing but a shell. I know not who to love. I know not who I am. Without looking at my past, I cannot decide where I want to go in the future and what I shall do in the present to take myself there. If I do not look back, I know not the mistakes I should not make again. I know not what values that matter to me.
I'll take the past with me. So I can continue to live in the past walking the path to the future. Hopefully one day, we could all put down everything and be together again. We'll chat and chess the days away while waiting for death to claim the lasts of us.
I can relate.. and it doesnt get any easier, even after 10 years, especially after you go back to Singapore for a visit, spending time with your family and friends always, always makes you feel like a piece of your heart has been ripped out and left behind in Singapore..
ReplyDeleteBut not to worry, i've found that keeping myself busy and immersing yourself into the life you've created here helps immensely!
im busy and immersing myself all the time :P
Deletehaha at least you know u have some1 to chat with haha....we will alway remember you and yr daughter still refuse to come out ar...
ReplyDeleteah pooh
i hope u and aku will not forget us :(
Deletedotter still doing paper work with god pa pa thats y lo
ReplyDeletethen ... still quening for the stork kor kor taxi to freight
ReplyDeletefinally out already.... phew
DeleteThe Past is history,
ReplyDeleteThe future is a mystery,
Today is a gift, that's why it is called Present.