Just Another Blow

I had about 3-4 days of fresh blood in urine post op. After that, urine appeared clear for the rest of the painful week. The second week was better. There seemed to be no blood and the flow was fast and furious. The pain was subsiding each day though it never really went away. The urine smelt bad though and it wasn't as clear as I preferred. It looked like I had gotten infection in the urinary tract since my surgery. The cranberries concentrated which Singaporean Mum, M, got for me didn't really work. So didn't the dried cranberries Sham kindly bought for me.

At this point, I don't think it is a good idea to take anymore medication such as antibiotics or other pills. The body requires as much rest as it can get and as little toxins as I can help shoving down my throat. My diet was changed from a not so healthy one to a very healthy one for about two months by now. Even M said I looked better though I didn't particularly feel better, other than pain subsiding during urination.

Yesterday I had blood again. It was a tad disappointing, given the effort I put in to get well. Unlike previous experiences, the blood didn't subside after drinking more water and peeing a few more times. It carried on for the entire day until this morning. Along the way, I thought I had blood clots coming out twice. After reading experiences of past bladder cancer patients who went through the same transurethral resection of bladder tumour (TURBT). Many reported similar experience like mine, bleeding came back weeks after the surgery and observed scabs being forced out from the bladder in the process, followed by more bleeding. Some even reported blood clots being expelled out.

Was those scabs or clots? I remembered wanting to stick my hand into the toilet bowl to feel the dark spots. I didn't because I wasn't in adventurous mood yesterday and I am kicking myself now. I would have save myself a lot of worries if I did that. A blood clot would no doubt dissolve into the urine volume at my touch. A scab wouldn't. Should I confirm it was scab then it wasn't necessarily a bad thing. All wounds have them and they drop off after a while. Sometimes the wound will continue to bleed but to a much lesser extent than the first fresh wound.

My hunch was telling me they were scabs. After a few sessions of 'talking to myself' as suggested by M's dad, I began to have more faith. There were evidences to support my hunch. The colour of the bloody urine looked quite different from any I had seen so far. It was more of a tea colour rather than rose syrup. I also saw some tiny black spotty stuff that I thought was smaller blood clots after the bigger ones got out in the previous pee. I thought the smaller ones looked very angular to be clots, which had to be curvy because of its liquid form.

I managed to get the last two urine samples clear. They didn't even smell (as) bad like the usual ones. Hopefully all is well. 3.5 weeks more to the lab test results. There are no fingers left to cross and I can't do it with my toes.

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