The Better Son of Punggol

"Before we moved into our house in the combined accounts of our banks, in the pockets together we had $11.50, so we were scratching our heads thinking how to even have our first meal in the house when we had no money to buy chopsticks? We went down to Toyogo at Lorong 8 Toa Payoh and we had to count the number of pieces of chopsticks we can buy with $11.50 to equip our home." 

- Son of Punggol via shitmsn [link]

I had a good laugh. Then karma struck. Today I became the real Son of Punggol, who just came back from Punggol a few days ago with A$10 in the pocket. I had to survive 4 days. Too easy. I could do that blindfolded because there were food in the house. Now that I am locked out from my own house with my direct landlord out of town with no lock picking set, I have no food. I don't have an ATM or credit card because I am too poor for them in the first place and I swore I will never borrow money from friends again so I won't.

I have two days remaining before the dear wifey comes back to Perth. $10 for two days. Still too easy. Why don't God create a harsher handicap by summoning a wind to blow the note away when I checked out my wallet at noon? Hahaha. Too late. I already spent my money. God is merciful after all.

So if you are expecting to see a picture of my chopsticks here, you shall be disappointed. I may be a klutz but I am not a moron. I guessed I overdone it a little. I bought enough food to last me till next week. Never mind, good to play it safe.

The first thing I bought was 2kg of apples. This is one of the cheapest quality food one can buy in these situation. My friend Jeremy told me he once did that with eggs and he was spot on. 2-3 hard boiled chicken eggs can fill the stomach and cost less than $1. As I do not have cooking equipment, I'll have to give that a pass. With A$3.00, I got myself more than 12 apples. That's actually enough for 2 days already and I'll maintain myself full of vitamins, fiber and natural sugar, keeping doctors a mile away more effectively than garlic. Good buy, I must say. I am a genius. The rest of the stuff are:

That pack of assorted vegetable that cost A$3.00 normally last me at least 3-4 meals. Good thing I have some simple dressing at the work place, we always have sauces and dressings in stock due to the occasional company BBQ. I will be alright there, throwing some tomatoes in the mix. That's a lot of tomatoes for one person to consume mind you. If I manage to down them all, I'll grow a tomato plant from the top of my head by the time Albany sees daddy. I got myself some strawberries because I felt the need to pamper and feel sorry for myself moping in the evenings. I found some lemons from a tree nearby so that will add zing to whatever combination of food I conjure up for the next meals.

Magic fruit provides magic
So my bill came up to A$9.65, leaving me some spare change. I reckoned I did better than the original Son of Punggol, who managed to buy all but some fancy chopsticks. If that was all he got to muster over 30%+ of votes from Punggol-East voters, I must be able to give Ah Lian a better run for the money. But oh wait, Singaporeans only vote for lawyers or doctors, never mind if he only check backside.

1 comment:

  1. did u had really bad experience borrowing $$?

    hiaz. i was in a shet hole 2 months back. suddenly i ponder where are my frds when i needed them? none. but i was always there for them. when i needed a small favor, i got shunned.